Galahs use the internet for malicious mischief. I’m using the word galah with its slang meaning: a loud-mouthed idiot or silly person. (For those not familiar with the word, galah is pronounced g’LAH with the emphasis on the last syllable so the word rhymes with ‘star’.) This term evolved from the noisy antics of the pink and grey Australian cockatoo called a galah.
Aussie galahs, feathered and non-feathered, are usually harmless but the internet galahs are not. Like the pink and grey cockatoos, they peck at things and, just as with the feathered variety, a single galah is often followed by a gaggle of galahs.
My focus today is with the way those internet galahs damage the review status of a book on Amazon.
In my case a galah gave one of my books a one-star rating even though he hadn’t even read the book! He simply didn’t like books in series. A book’s review status is one of its major selling points. This galah’s one-star rating meant that the review status of my book was reduced, through no fault of the book. That’s what I call bloody unfair! Immediately after he had posted, a gaggle of galahs swooped down and used their nasty beaks to mark his ‘review’ as ‘helpful’ which gave it authenticity and credibility thus further negatively impacting on the book. Despite the fact that this individual admitted to not reading the book and despite the fact that his comment did not even come close to being a review of my book, and despite the fact that several kind fellow authors complained about his so-called review, Amazon refused to remove it.
I subsequently found that many other authors have had to endure this sort of Mephistophelian review posting. I know life wasn’t meant to be fair, but readers can help to minimise the unfair action of galahs and therefore support the hard work of authors by doing the following:
You are posting a review of a book that you liked and you’d like to give it 3.5 stars but there are no half stars on Amazon. In such cases, rather than click 3 stars, lean to the positive side and click 4 stars. The same applies if you think you’d like to give a book 4.5 stars; rather than click on 4 stars, click on 5 stars. In other words, add a star to cancel out a galah!
Naturally you will not wish to ‘add a star for a galah’ for every book you read. I’m just suggesting you bear in mind that your stars might not have the impact they should because of the activity of galahs. Of course, it is possible that galahs will not attack the particular book you are reviewing but either way you will have supported an author whose book you enjoyed reading.
You might also consider koalas when wondering whether to add another star. Koalas are not at all malicious. No, they are wonderful people who read a book, like it and take the time to post a review on Amazon. BUT they sometimes press 1 star even though they loved the book (evidenced by their comments). They don’t understand how the review system works or perhaps they’re just a bit sleepy – koalas sleep up to 20 hours a day. I know how easy it is to be a koala because I’ve been one myself.
So now you know about galahs and koalas I hope some of you dear readers of books will keep them in mind when posting reviews. Thank you so much.